Reflections on a movie - angst and connections
It's around 10pm on a Saturday night. I am home, alone. Some of my best friends (Jason Hamm, Doug Collins, Chris DiCarlo and Kyle Allen) were here in town this weekend for a get together. We played ping pong, cards and whiffle ball baseball just like we always have. It was wonderful to reconnect, bond and relax with my lifelong buddies.
They are gone now, back to their homes, in and out of town, but I am still here.
When I left India, I brought only one movie with me. It is called, "Mr. and Mrs. Iyer." It is mostly in English and it a love story of sorts. It's about a love that cannot be. That does not come to fruition because the woman is married and has a child. But feelings are there, emotions are expressed and longing, regret, angst and sadness are what you are left with as the movie ends. For me, it feels like more than the movie just ended. I began watching that movie over a week ago. In some strange way, a movie that I had never seen had served as a connection to my life in India that would remain as long as I didn't finish watching the movie. It is over now. I do not have my sole, coveted Indian movie to look forward to anymore. As I turned off the DVD player, I felt as if I had indeed been amputated from my life in India. I have been cut off. It is now, officially over.
In reality, it is not over at all. I am not disconnected from the country that I consider to be my second home. Just this morning I spoke with my friend Erica of Toronto, who is, at this moment, working in the Himalayas of India. Only a few days ago I chatted with Sonal, who is in Pune, working on her thesis this summer. Nearly everyday, I at least attempt (with increasing success) to make Indian food or chai. Whenever I try to speak Spanish to someone around here, it comes out as a crazy, unintelligible and no doubt extremely rare mixture of Hindi and Spanish (would that be called "Hanish," Sindi" or perhaps, "Spindi?"). I have been giving slideshow presentations on India to groups of friends and Rotarians. And I have been brainstorming on humanitarian projects that I might facilitate between Rotary clubs here and others in India. Even though I greatly miss my life in India, and feel the pain of separation from my good friends there, the bonds I have built between these our countries are alive and well.
It's funny how a movie can inspire one to think in certain ways. After writing down these thoughts and reminding myself of my connection with India, I feel more upbeat. I am still going to have to scour the video shops and find more Hindi films (I recently discovered Blockbuster has only 2!) I would like to put down more thoughts on how things have been going with this most recent round of reintegration into life in America, but I am beat and must sleep.
Shoob rattri!
Buenas nochas!
or is it Shoob nochas? or Buenas rattri?
